My tips for when you do have to referee and coach:
Prepare the team well before kick-off - make time to do warm-ups and talk about positions.
Sort out the substitutes and get a parent to organise them, you may be able to write down a rota for subbing at certain times in the match.
Get one or two of the parents to make a few notes during the match about what they think is going right or wrong. They can write them down and hand them to you at half time. Or you can get them to give a short synopsis of their thoughts on the game to your players at half time.
Explain to your son or daughter that during the game you are the referee and they must respect your decisions - save any “discussions” until after the match!
In this way when the big decisions come along your mind will be clear enough to give the right ones and not full of how the team is playing.